Wednesday, October 31, 2007

The Brain That Wouldn't Die

In honor of Halloween, I watched the movie The Brain That Wouldn't Die (thanks to TIVO) last night. I've still been watching a lot of horror movies in an effort to make myself feel better about my migraines.

In the movie, a woman loses her head in an auto accident and her scientist boyfriend manages to keep her head alive with a serum from some experiments he's been doing on transplants. I was thinking that it really sucks to be her and she was pretty pissed off about the whole thing, too.

The kicker is where he goes looking for a body for her. Burlesque Clubs and Cheesecake Photography studios. You could just see him thinking "well, I should upgrade the package while I can." He didn't ask her what type of body she wanted!

As you can guess, the whole thing ends badly. The movie did make me feel better because at least I'm not The Brain That Wouldn't Die. I'd hate to be a head with a migraine and no body.

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Migraine Plus Cold Equals One Cranky Chick

Right now, I've got a nasty cold on top of my migraine pain, which makes me feel like I'm living at the corner of Migraine Avenue and Cold Street. I'm not sure which is the worst thing to have with a migraine, a cold? a toothache? an ear ache? a sinus infection? It just seems like more than one type of pain in your head is a lot to deal with.

Do you know what I noticed since my cold started on Thursday? My co-workers were far more sympathetic about this snot ridden cold than they have ever been about my migraines. Everyone was telling me to feel better. There was genuine concern about how I was going to spend my weekend with my cold and did I have enough cold medicine, etc.

Is it because they can understand what a cold is like and not a migraine? Is it because they can see the snotty tissue filling up my trash can at work and not see the horrible pain inside my head from a migraine?

I found this really bothering me because I feel my migraines equal the distress of a cold.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Unremarkable Me

Well, I got my tests results for my MRI yesterday in the mail. It was basically a one line letter from my doctor saying the MRI obtained was entirely normal, and she enclosed the test results for my records.

I didn't understand most of the technical results, but there was some stuff about me having an unremarkable head, which I felt was a little insulting. I mean they could have said I have nicely shaped orbits or something.

Part of me was relieved that they didn't find anything, and another part of me was depressed because I'm still in the same sinking migraine ship as before the test.

Also, I've tried the Midrin three times, and the only thing it did was make me dizzy. It didn't help my migraine at all.

Therefore, I think I'm going to go see this neurologist one more time and say "The Amerge was a nightmare. The Midrin only made me dizzy and my head is unremarkable. Now what?????"

Monday, October 22, 2007

Achmed, the new migraine mascot

Saturday night I went to see Jeff Dunham, comedian/ventriloquist, at The Ford Community & Performing Arts Center in Dearborn. I had been fighting medium to hot migraine pain all day, but I really want to go see him because my friends had scored front row seats.

Before the show started, they were blaring loud music and the stage lights were super bright, and I was really starting to think I was going to have to bail, but when he came on stage the music stopped and the lights were turned down.

I thought his funniest dummy was Achmed, the dead terrorist. Achmed is a skeleton-looking character, who is dead but does not know it until Jeff finally convinces him. Then he becomes distraught, looking for his 72 virgins only finding a bunch of "ugly ass guys out there."

As I was watching Achmed, I realized that the dude really looks like he has a migraine and he would be a perfect migraine mascot. A couple times, he looked straight at me. His bizarre eyes bored into mine, and I could have sworn my migraine pain was looking right back at me!

The funny thing is that during the show, I totally forgot about how much my head was hurting. I was aware of it throbbing a couple times, but after the show, the pain went kerpow! It was as if it was saying "how dare you not pay attention to me!"

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

A typical Migraine Chick Week

Well, I'm having a typical migraine chick week so far. I've already had to reschedule another mammogram appointment because of my throbbing migraine, and I had to call sick into work today, because I was afraid to drive to work and I thought I would be a danger to the customers on the phone, making mistakes, etc... so I've been laying comatose in bed for most of the day with my cat.

Last night, I tried to wash my hair. One thing that really sucks about having chronic migraines is washing my hair, because if my head really hurts, then I don't really want to touch it, but sooner or later it has to be done. This time it went horribly wrong. In the shower, I found the shampoo that I had applied to my head was simply not lathering up, so I applied another huge dollop and I added a bunch more water. It was still slime city. Then I realized it didn't smell right either. Instead of fruit it smelled like sandalwood. WTF?

That's when I noticed I was trying to wash my hair with Dove Night Time Body Wash. I use it once in a blue moon if I'm in the mood, but I defiantly wasn't in the mood last night and not with a ton of it on my head.

I had to wash my hair with my regular shampoo twice more before I could get the smell and the slimy sensation out of my hair. I was not a happy Migraine Chick by the time the whole incident was over.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Migraine Matinee

I made these pictures with Image Chef to express my current mood about my migraine today, but I'm not sure which one I like more. What do you think?

Monday, October 15, 2007

I was farting around on Myspace this weekend, and I came across a book about To Do Lists which is coming out in November that I can't wait to buy. I might even have to pre-order it.

To-Do List: From Buying Milk to Finding a Soul Mate, What Our Lists Reveal About Us.

"What Do Your Lists Say About You?

More and more, we are a nation of list-makers, from grocery lists, New Year's resolutions, and things to do before we die to DVDs to rent and people we've kissed. In To-Do List (based on the popular blog of the same name, Sasha Cagen celebrates the humble to-do list, exploring the ways these scribbled agendas reflect our personalities and passions.

To-Do List is both a celebration of lists and a peek at the lists that others create. Broken down by subjects like "Daily Lists" to "Sex Lists," it's a fascinating collection of lists from everyday people to the well-known:

Novelist Nick Hornby's list of desert island discs

A therapist's secret fears ("I HATE having to think about clients in relation to my hair or clothes")

A shopping list from chef Alice Waters of Chez Panisse

A woman's accomplishments before her thirtieth birthday ("Hot air ballooned over the Serengeti," "Danced on a table in Vegas")

Qualities one man is looking for in a future wife, including "Chews with her mouth shut" and "Will let me give my first son the middle name of 'Jacob'"

With each list, Cagen offers the story behind it and a prompt for readers to compare notes and take their own stab at a similar list.

Voyeuristic and interactive, To-Do List will show you just how much -- and what -- your lists say about you."

The author has a blog, too. To-Do List Blog

Saturday, October 13, 2007

Acupuncture Barbie!

Migraine Barbie was starting to wonder if the home acupuncture kit for her migraines was a good idea or not.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

More Proof I'm Going Nuts

I've still been having the worst week with my head, last night included. Even though I was exhausted, I met a girlfriend at a new Borders Books for coffee after work. I know I should have rescheduled, but I really wanted to see her.

I didn't stay too long. She wanted to get home to see Pushing Daisies, so we finished our coffees and we went for a quick browse around the store.

Normally, I would have dove into the new fiction table, but last night, my vision was so bad that I could hardly read the back covers of the books, and just the thought of reading about a perky heroine in the city finding her perfect life after some trials and tribulations, including some fashion crises, made me feel more naueous.

Then I found this book How to Survive a Horror Movie which I figured if I can learn how to survive a horror movie maybe I can learn to survive my migraines.

"How to Survive a Horror Movie teaches readers how to cope with every kind of horror movie obstacle, from ax-wielding psychopaths to haunted Japanese VHS tapes. Chapters include:

How to Survive a Night of Babysitting
How to Convince the Skeptical Local Sheriff
How to Perform an Exorcism
How to Tell If You've Been Dead Since the Beginning of the Movie
How to Vanquish a Murderous Doll "

Next, I found this stuffed monkey. I don't know I bought him. I just had to buy him.

So I was probably the only adult last night that left Borders with a horror movie book and a stuffed monkey. Do you see what my migraines are doing to me?

Monday, October 8, 2007

Attack of the Giant Verp!

One big disadvantage in having migraines is being unable to keep appointments, especially things like teeth cleaning and haircuts, when the last thing I want is someone poking and prodding at your head.

I had to cancel my yearly mammogram late last week because my head was acting up, and I thought I might pass out from the mixture of head pain and titty pain when the x-ray machine clamped down on me. I had to reschedule.

Therefore, I really didn’t want to cancel my dental appointment on Saturday morning, because I was already feeling guilty enough about the cancelled mammogram. When I woke up, feeling nauseous with my ears ringing and with my brain bouncing around the inside of my skull to a migraine techno beat, I decided to suck down a ginger ale along with some drugs and I still went to the dentist.

The minute the technician lowered me back in the chair, I knew it was bad and not just, “you can hang in there bad.” The fluorescent lights scorched through my closed eyelids and a giant verp (vomit burp) erupted from my stomach.

It was at that point that I said maybe we should just do the crown delivery today and skip the cavity filling for another day.

“Are you o.k.?” she asked.

I told her about the migraine. The dentist came in. She told him how I was feeling, and he agreed we should just try to do the crown delivery. He tried to pull off my temporary. “Ouch,” I cried. He had to numb me up. Then the stupid new crown didn’t fit. It was too loose. They were going to have to send it back.

He left. She glued the temporary back on. That’s the point when I started frantically gesturing for her to let me back up and covering my mouth. This was more than a giant verp. She got me up, ran, and got a wastebasket.

A few minutes later, it was over. However, she still needed to pick off the remaining glue. I washed out my mouth five or six times and she acted as if she was diffusing a land mine as she removed the remaining glue in my mouth.

So what did I learn? If you wake up with major head pain, reschedule your appointment no matter what, even if you have rescheduled three other appointments earlier in the week. It’s just not worth it.

Saturday, October 6, 2007

Surprise Results!

I got the unofficial results from my mri, and this is what they saw! No wonder I'm having migraines with a noggin like this one.

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

The Soylent Green MRI

I went for my first MRI on my head yesterday. Before I got there, I had visions of being stuck down a long tube in a big machine, after hearing horror stories from other people, but this place had a wide-open MRI. Upon my first impression, I thought it looked cool like it was from a science fiction movie.

As the technician got me ready and I looked around the room more, I started to realize how Soylent Green the whole set up was. In the 1973 movie about the future where people are turned into crackers to feed the human race, there is a scene where an elderly man opts to be euthanized at a sleep center, and he sees motion pictures of earth’s beauty in former times before he dies.

In my MRI room, there was an oval track of pale green calming light on the ceiling. On one wall, there was a projection of a beach with palm trees and boats in the blue water. Before I lay down, she gave me earplugs to put inside my ears. Then she handed me headphones, which I put over my ears. Calming seaside sounds and new age music was playing. As she adjusted my position and then sent me into the machine, I had only one thought.

“I don’t want to be a cracker.”

Forty-five minutes, it was over. Thank goodness, I was still in one piece. She said my doctor should have the results in three to five business days. Great. That gives me almost a week for my over active imagination to dream up bizarre things that might be inside my melon.